The Void

I seem to want to be there a lot these days, in that place where all creation takes place before it manifests.  I’ve been doing a lot of ‘daydreaming’, it seems for weeks, or even months.  Sometimes I worry that I’m depressed, or my back just hurts too much to move.  But I think it’s more than that.

You know what?  Sometimes I just get tired of thinking, and deciding,  I just want to sit and watch the world go by.  In the past I’ve always had a book I’m reading, usually one of the new spiritual or self-help books.  But lately, I have no interest in reading.  And sometimes I drag myself to the page to put something there as a daily ‘meditation’ of some sort.

Last summer was a little like that, although I was aware of processing some personal emotional issues.  I liked the solitude I experienced while doing that.  But these days are different.  I’m feeling that something I’m not aware of is causing me to sit still and just BE.

It feels a little like I imagine cocooning is like for the caterpillar.  I even want to crawl into bed much earlier in the evening than before.  And I sleep in much later in the mornings.  Sometimes I get up for a few minutes and then go right back to bed.  It’s during those hours that I seem to have the dreams that are so much fun to solve.

I just plain want to rest a while, and wait for what’s coming next.

Water color by Leslie Allyn – used with permission

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